Essay/Term paper: Sex who needs it
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I"ve found the past couple of years to be an eye opener in the world of
sexual experiences. I"m not necessarily referring to my own
experiences, but those of society in general. There was a time when
more smart-conscious decisions were made relating to sexual
relationships. But times have changed. The pillars that hold up our
individual sexual values have started to crumble. No longer can we
create our own standards without feeling ostracized by the society that
forms the standards for us. With influences coming from the media,
infatuated hormones and opinionated peers, teenagers today have turned
the act of love making into a whimsical joyride.
The difference between making love and having sex is miles apart. To
make love, the partners involved use their hearts more so than their
parts. To have sex, the partners use their parts more so than their
hearts. The key to this Dr. Seuss rhyme lies in the selected noun that
the partners use in their actions. Since hormones and feelings (hearts)
both exist on a different level, saying that they are the same would be
to take away all the feeling, emotion and love involved in love making.
Teens are letting their hormones control their sexual decisions by
giving in to the pure pleasure of sex. To make up for their lack of
solid reasoning behind their acts, they try to rationalize their
choices. The justification that many couples come up with for having
sex is love. I can"t help but wonder how many couples would actually
stay together if their relationship existed without sex.
Friends and peers are a big pressure factor when deciding weather or not
to have sex. As seen in many after school specials, the popular "C"mon,
everybody is doing it," isn"t far off the mark. Just knowing that three
or four other couples in a social group are having sex can sway a couple
to give in and start hitting their own home runs on their sexual playing
field. With each new couple having sex, the pressure current becomes
stronger and stronger, especially for those couples not sexually active.
At this point many couples get swept in the flow of the current and just
go with it; they do the nasty. Once they"ve committed themselves to
having sex, it"s very hard to stop. The couple might find out that they
aren"t ready for this big step in their relationship, but to stop having
sex would mean to lose face with friends! Well, do you think that
they"re going to stop having sex? Not a chance! And, so they continue
their acts of whimsical joyriding, without any care to see where the
ride is taking them, just to keep their status with their social group.
The media is also a persuasive factor that plays a large role in the
life of a teenager. Although t.v. shows, films and magazines are all
supposed to offer escape from reality, many teens buy into the
situations presented as if they were real. For instance, how many teens
watch Beverly Hills, 90210? Now, here"s a show that says to kids
straight out, "It"s o.k. to have casual sex and not think of any
consequences." The writers even took the only virgin on the show,
Donna, who remained true to her faith for so long, and had her give up
her virginity. The one thing the writers failed to look at however, is
the number of youth that watch the show, and in that number, how many
take the ideals of the show and use them as their own personal values.
All of the characters on 90210, the most popular "teen" show on t.v.,
have casual sex. Teens who watch the show are going to take this into
account when they have their own sexual experiences. The love and care
given/received in a teenager"s "90210 relationship" can only reflect the
fake morals seen on-screen.
The reality of consequence is the fastest wake-up call anyone can have
given to them. One needs not carry a glass ball around with them to
predict the future. All it takes is being able to visualize the
repercussions of their actions. Now, I know that every teenager has
been taught in health class how the sexual reproduction system of a
human works: the little male spermy-wormy goes for a swim up the canal
and fertilizes the little female egg-weggy. So, I am dumbfounded when a
couple that has had unprotected sex is shocked when they find out
they"re expecting. Well, Hell-oOo?!? Didn"t you read the label on your
penis, buddy? You know, the one that said, "May cause pregnancy; avoid
use before you are ready to father children." In a case like this many
people will have an abortion. Abortions are used so often that I"m sure
by now it can be considered a method of birth control. And if the
parents do decide to keep the baby, how can they care for it? To pay
for all of a baby"s needs, a full time paycheck is required. Assuming
the mother stays home to care for the child, the father needs to quite
school to work full time. Once someone leaves high school, they seldom
come back. So, now he"s stuck taking care of a baby and the wife (as
he"s probably married by now), paying for all the diapers, food,
clothing, health care, mortgage, insurance, etc. These two parents have
all the responsibilities of grown-ups…and they"re only in their teens!
And what"s it all for? A simple night of hot blooded, hormone filled
passion, or as I refer to it, a whimsical joyride.
The pillars haven"t totally fallen to the ground although the pressure
has been great. With so much outside influence, it is hard to come to
our own conclusions about what"s right for us. Everybody else seems to
already know. The rate at which teenagers are evolving is awesome. We
want to do it all and we want to do it now! I hope that we take the
time to learn about the joys of the heart and try to shy away from the
joys of the part. The former is much more fulfilling, I"m sure, and
leaves you with more respect for yourself and your significant
other…that and it gives you a nice, warm feeling inside.?